Dec. 6, 2023
Daring to Live Differently: Lisa Jansen's Nomadic Journey
There’s something deeply inspiring about choosing a life that feels true to you—even when it looks completely different from what’s expected. I had the chance to connect with Lisa Jansen, a New Zealand-based writer and digital nomad, to talk about her bold decision to step away from a conventional life and create something entirely her own.
We explore what it really means to walk away from “what’s next” and instead ask “what else is possible?” From life on the road in a camper van to the lessons she’s learned about happiness, freedom, and self-discovery, this conversation is a powerful reminder that there is no one-size-fits-all path in life.
Episode Highlights
[02:19] - Lisa Jansen reflects on the moment she chose a different path at age 33
[02:50] - Questioning societal expectations and redefining what “next” looks like
[04:03] - How a simple idea turned into six years of life on the road
[06:58] - Downsizing, letting go, and discovering how little we truly need
[09:45] - The unexpected challenge of missing community and belonging
[11:05] - The rewards of freedom, self-trust, and living intentionally
[13:08] - How her lifestyle evolved from fast travel to slow living and house sitting
[15:07] - Hidden gems across New Zealand and the beauty of off-the-beaten-path travel
[18:42] - Embracing introversion and finding strength in solitude
[20:41] - A pivotal moment that led to becoming a published author
[22:42] - Advice for navigating societal pressure and creating your own path
[27:39] - What fulfillment truly looks like when you live life your way
[30:23] - A powerful lesson on letting go of regret
[31:53] - Redefining success as happiness and contentment
[32:52] - What’s next: finding balance between freedom and stability
Links & Resources
- Website & Blog: https://lifedonedifferently.com
- Instagram & Facebook: @lifedonedifferentlynz
Follow Amelia
Instagram: @AmeliaOldOfficial
Website: https://AmeliaOld.com
If this conversation made you pause and think about your own path, take that as your sign to explore what’s possible for you. And if you enjoyed listening, be sure to follow, rate, share, and leave a review—it helps these stories reach more people.
Chapters
00:01 - Lisa Jansen's Unconventional Journey
04:03 - Transformative Journey
12:56 - Travel New Zealand, Find Hidden Gems
16:50 - Solitude's Role in Personal Transformation
22:34 - Navigating Societal Expectations
28:39 - Regrets, Success, and Future Adventures
33:45 - Changing Paths and New Book
Transcript
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Welcome to Voices of Inspiration.
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I'm your host, amelia Old.
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Today, we embark on exploration into the unconventional journey of a New Zealand-based writer and digital nomad.
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In 2017, at 33, lisa Janssen made a courageous decision, bidding farewell to a thriving career, seeking a life unburdened by societal expectations.
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For five years, she ventured through the enchanting landscapes of New Zealand, dwelling in her camper van and unraveling the mysteries of existence.
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This remarkable odyssey is chronicled in her third book, life Done Differently One Woman's Journey on the Road Less Traveled.
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She's also the author of One Size Does Not Fit All Discover your Personal Path to a Happier Life and the Nomad's Ultimate Guide to New Zealand.
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Beyond the covers of her books, she also shares captivating narratives on her blog, lifedundifferentlycom.
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As we immerse ourselves in this conversation, I'll let you in on a little behind-the-scenes moment.
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Towards the end of the interview, we did encounter a minor hiccup on the video side, but all of the audio was preserved and you will not miss any of Lisa's profound insights.
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This is just the unpredictable dance of technology.
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Join me in extending a warm welcome to our guest, lisa Jansen.
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Everyone has a story to tell.
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We connect and relate to one another when we share our stories.
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My name is Amelia Ove and I am your host of Voices of Inspiration.
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Join me as I share stories that friends, family and strangers will my everyday life and travels.
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We will laugh, possibly cry.
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We'll walk away feeling connected more than ever to those around you and ready to be the change our world needs.
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Everyone has a story to tell.
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What's yours?
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I really appreciate you joining me today.
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I know that it is Saturday morning for you, so you're a day ahead, and I appreciate you taking time out of your Saturday morning to be with me.
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No worries at all, and thank you so much for having me.
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I'm really excited to have a chat.
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So we were just talking about, yesterday for you was the anniversary of where this journey for you began.
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So first of all, I want to say congratulations, because it's an incredible story that I can't wait to share with everyone.
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But it's been six years since this started.
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Can you take us back to the moment when you decided to leave your job and explore life beyond the conventional path of a marriage and kids and mortgages and things like that?
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Yeah, happy to, and it was a bit of a process that took a few months, but basically when I was 33, back in 2017, I kind of got to this point in my life where everything was really great.
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I had a great job and I had great friends and great hobbies and life was good and I started to ask myself what's next?
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I think something a lot of us do.
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Somehow, we're always seem to be like what's next?
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What's next?
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And, of course, being 33 at the time, looking around me, what I saw was everyone was getting married or had already gotten married, started to have kids, buying houses, really career focused and it was kind of great to see that for my friends, I enjoyed being part of it for them but it didn't feel like the thing that I wanted to do, and so really started to ask myself okay, what else is there?
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What do you do with your life if you don't want to follow that traditional path of marriage, kids, mortgages, careers?
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And at the time, I wasn't really sure if I definitely didn't want it or if I just didn't want it yet.
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But I just wanted to be able to answer that question like what's the alternative?
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And I think a lot of us when we have these sort of thoughts, you know, the idea of travel comes up right.
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There's something about travel that really, I think, sort of expands your mindset and your horizon and opens, you know, your mind and your heart to other ideas, and so that's kind of where I started.
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So I was like, okay, I want to take some time out of my, you know, busy, career focused life in Auckland and I want to just travel.
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And so initially it was supposed to be just a summer.
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Take some, take a summer off work and I'm going to travel and I'm going to figure out, you know, what I want to do with my life.
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And so that's then led to the decision to buy the camper van and set off for a summer, and that summer has now turned into six years.
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So that's incredible.
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So what if your family and friends think about this?
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When you just sprung this on, you know like, hey, I'm going to leave my life and just start anew.
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Yeah, good question.
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So I live in New Zealand but my family is mostly in Germany, my sister's in the UK, so there's a lot of distance, kind of geographically which, and it's been like that.
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So I've been in New Zealand 17 years now.
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Even back then it was, you know, 10 years, and so they didn't have that day to day role in my life and so for them it was, I think you know, it was just okay.
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You know that's just something she's doing.
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And again, because I said I was only going to do it for a summer, it was sort of easy for them, I think, to wrap their head around it and similar with friends.
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I think, you know, at that point I've already sort of figured out that I'm maybe, you know, a little bit sort of looking for something different in life to most people.
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And so no one was all that surprised when I said I'm going to take a summer off to travel.
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And then, when it, you know, extended beyond that summer, I think everyone just saw how much I was loving it and what a great time I was having and how good it was for me.
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And yeah, so I have to say I've been really lucky, everyone's been really supportive and I'm sure there've been some, you know, some sort of oh what the hell is she doing?
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Kind of you know moments and they probably don't always understand my choices, but I've been very lucky that you know my friends and my family have always respected them and always supported it, so very grateful for that.
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Having that support is incredibly important.
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And also, you know, I think that you're lucky that you have that support because you know, I think that in my younger years, if I had sprung that on any of my friends and family, while they might not have been necessarily surprised, because they're used to me coming out with outlandish ideas, they, I think that they would have been a little bit more concerned.
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What has fired you to choose that specific lifestyle and how do you think it shaped your perspective on life?
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You know that's a really good question and honestly, I don't really know or like the idea to live and travel in a camper van came out of nowhere.
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You know, it wasn't that at the time I had seen, you know, friends or family do it, or I didn't, you know, even know that this whole van life thing was a thing on social media and whatnot.
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So yeah, it's very popular here in New Zealand.
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There's a lot of, you know, the whole camping and RVing, motorhomes, a big thing.
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So that's probably had a little bit of an influence.
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But it was just one of those things where, you know, I had spent months trying to figure out what I want to do and then I had this idea and it just was right.
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You know, when you just have that, that idea and you just know in your heart like, yeah, that's it, that's the thing I want to do, so, yeah.
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So I don't really know where it came from, it was a bit random, but you know it's definitely felt right from the beginning and how it's shaped my perspective, you know, in so so many ways it's honestly been such a transformative journey and you know, from one of the first things I kind of, you know, learned living in the van.
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So I went from living in a relatively modern house in Auckland, which is New Zealand's biggest city, with, you know, lots of stuff closet full of clothes and shoes and all that stuff that you have right and then I downsized from that to a little van and really only sort of the basics and and that was incredibly liberating.
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You know, getting rid of stuff and really downsizing to only what you need, it just was incredibly liberating and freeing.
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And then that sort of made me realize how little I actually need to be happy, because, you know, there I was less stuff than I ever really had and I was happier than ever and life was simple and and sort of I was focused on the right things rather than all these distractions that I used to have.
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You know, living that kind of career focused life in Auckland, and so that was sort of the first big mind shift.
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You know really made me realize how distracted I had been in many ways before and and then having that clarity, yeah, was just incredibly and incredible and really helped me sort of connect to who I am, who I want to be, how I want to live my life, rather than, you know, just being distracted and just sort of chasing after things because everyone else is chasing after them, or society tells us that what, that's what we should be chasing after.
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Yeah, and in so many more ways that it's shaped my life like I would probably spend the next hour just answering that question.
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What do you think that you missed the most from before?
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That's a really easy question to answer now and and you know it's I wouldn't have said this three years ago, but now that it's been six years, it's a sense of community and belonging.
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So it's been so amazing to travel and to see New Zealand in a way that you know a few people have and anyone who's ever been to New Zealand or, you know, seen photos, like you know everyone else is an absolutely incredible and amazing place and and I've had a chance to see all of it and really explore in depth, which has been awesome.
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But the big downside of living this way for six years now is that I'm I don't really have a sense of belonging or community.
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I still sort of Auckland, still the closest thing to home I have, but even that isn't really anymore.
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You know a lot of my friends there have now actually moved on as well and and so I miss having that you know regular group of people around me.
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I also, you know, miss little things like being able to join a tramping club or, you know, volunteering somewhere or just, you know, going to that cafe down the road where they know your name and how you like your coffee because you come all the time right.
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So that's yeah, that's definitely the the thing I miss the most.
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What are some of the rewards you've gained from your new lifestyle?
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So so many, and you know it's definitely so far the good stuff outweighs the challenges by a long shot, and so I would say, you know, the biggest is what I already talked about earlier, the sense of, you know, I don't need a lot to be happy.
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And what that, you know, meant for me, as an sort of extension of that, is that I realized, look, I don't have to work 40 hours plus a week in an office to be able to afford the kind of life I want.
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So that's that to me is freedom.
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You know, time is freedom and and other rewards are, you know, a really a much better sense of who I am, who I want to be, a sense of a real confidence and, you know, trusting myself, trusting my gut, doing life my own way.
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Lots of amazing people, you know.
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I've met so many amazing people on this journey and had conversations with people who I probably wouldn't have crossed path with in with a normal life.
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Like, I think, sometimes we don't realize how much we tend to surround ourselves with people very similar to us and how that automatically happens just based on how you live your life and then when you step out of that and you step into a completely different community.
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You know, all of a sudden, you meet people from very different kind of walks of life.
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So that's definitely been a huge, huge reward.
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And New Zealand you know I keep going on and on about it, but New Zealand is the best place in the world and being able to, you know, see it in the way that I have, it's just been absolutely amazing.
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So many awesome you know adventures, hiking and pedal boarding and surfing and surfing, and just like seeing you know these amazing places.
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Yeah, so it's probably more you know rewards.
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It's just, yeah, it's been such an incredible journey.
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So what is a typical week or month look like to you, how long are you in a specific area and what makes you choose that area?
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It's something that's really changed a lot over the years.
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So when I first set off in my van, I was really, you know, I wanted to travel and I wanted to see as much as possible.
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So I'd often only stay in one place for, you know, a couple of nights, maybe sometimes three nights, often only one night.
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So I really was kind of, you know, go there and go there, and go there, and I would choose the places a lot based on where I hadn't been in New Zealand at that point.
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You know, there were a few regions where I just hadn't been yet or, you know, favorite places to go back to, and really I love the outdoors and nature.
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So I would often look at, you know, where are good hikes or good spots for kite surfing or pedal boarding or those sort of activities.
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You know where's the weather good.
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So it was all kind of very, very loose.
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And then as time went on, it started to slow down a little bit and I would spend, you know, more time in one place.
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I'd travel slower.
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I started to house it occasionally.
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So then I would have, you know, sometimes three or four weeks, or even your five or six occasionally, in one place, house sitting, and that was, you know, just yeah, I think just the initial excitement was gone and so I slowed down a little bit and got really interested in going to those really off the beaten track places.
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So that kind of became a big, you know attracting big drive for me at that point.
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And then over the last year it sort of changed again, because last year I actually sold the camper van and since then I've been a full-time house sitter.
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So now I move around the country often sort of every you know four to six weeks.
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I had a three months house sit in one place this winter, which was the longest I'd been in one place in over you know six years.
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But yeah, so now it's where I go is very much sort of determined by where I can find house sitting jobs.
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What are some of your favorite hidden gems that you've come across?
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So many good ones.
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I love the kind of remote, off the beaten track places and so I always like to, you know, drive down the long gravel road and see what's at the other end.
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We're lucky to still have, you know, a few of those in New Zealand.
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So, yeah, so many different ones, like I love.
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In the North Island, at the very top, we have a place called Spirits Bay and there is another sort of place up North called Cabringa, which is very popular.
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Lots of you know people, lots of tourists go there.
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But then you sort of turn off and you follow a gravel road for, you know, 45 minutes and you get to this beautiful, remote beach at the top of the North Island called Spirits Bay.
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There's the East Cape, also in the North Island, which is a really beautiful, you know more remote area.
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It's got the East Cape Lighthouse, which is the first place in the world to see the sunrise each day.
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So that's pretty special, I reckon, to go and you can say it's like on that day I was the first person in the world to see the sun.
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And then, yeah, on the South Island it's probably even more remote places.
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There's the northern tip of the South Island, on the West Coast, just a super remote and just really beautiful beaches and, you know, heartlier, a solo inside.
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There's an area on the further down on the East Coast of the South Island called the Ketlins, which is one of those areas where there's so many, you know, walks and waterfalls and beaches, so you can spend, you know, like a few years ago I spent four weeks traveling, you know, probably 120 kilometers.
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I don't know what that is in miles, but it's not a lot.
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So you know, it's just so much to see that you can really take your time and make the most of every day.
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What role.
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Do you think that this time to yourself that you've had, what role has that had in your journey, both in terms of inspiration and self-discovery?
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Yeah, interesting to think about that.
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In a way, I've always been someone who's been very introverted, so I'm very comfortable with being on my own and I have this really rich inner world and can kind of entertain myself for days on end.
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And sometimes I look back and I sort of realized that the life that I was living in Auckland which was very busy, you know, every day I've been a busy office and a busy commute and lots of people and all these Influences and noises and people and everything around me, and I can look back and sort of realize that that wasn't the environment that I would thrive in, whereas the life that I live now, which is quieter, fewer people, fewer distractions, fewer sort of external stimulations, I feel like I've sort of become a lot more yeah, a lot more me and I'm a suits you know who I am a lot more.
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And it's really given me that Opportunity to do what, what I, as so many introverts, do so well, which is, you know, turn inwards and spend time in your own head and spend time daydreaming and and being, you know, peace with that and in a way, you know, it's given me a real new layer of appreciation for the strength of being an introvert, you know, because often Sort of in the, in the normal life so I don't really like the term normal life but don't have a battle and either, but it often is it is very much get towards extra.
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It's right especially kind of city life and and sort of sometimes if when you live in that environment, being an introvert can almost feel like a weakness or an issue or something you need to Work on.
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And stepping away from that and living a life that is really very well suited to to introverts is really given me a new level of appreciation for the strength of that, you know, for my ability to Do things on my own and to not be held back by not having someone else to come along with me and and my ability to think deeply and reflect on my own and and that sort of stuff.
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And so, yes, that's been a really Really good way how to shift it and my mindset and, yeah, has there been a specific moment or experience that you feel that's just had a profound impact on your journey.
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Probably a few along the way.
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I mean one, you know, one that's certainly been sort of a massive shift in my journey was Relatively early on.
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Said this point, I had been in the van probably about four, five months.
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I sort of just gone, you know, past the first summer and decided to keep going and and I was in this beautiful spot called Hamilton's gap, which is on the east, on the west coast of the North Island, really remote and really beautiful, and, and so at that point I had spent the last weeks are read, last few weeks already sort of reflecting on my journey to the state and you know the different things and life that had happened to get me to this point.
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But at that point it was really just a more or less random thoughts and ideas.
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And so I was in Hamilton, hamilton's gap, and it was just really peaceful, you know environment and space, and I got into a really kind of creative mindset and, without really intending to, these thoughts that had been in my mind turned into an outline for a book, and so this wasn't something like.
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I've always loved books, I love reading, but I didn't set off on this journey saying I want to write a book, right, it was just kind of something that happened because I was in this, in this mind space, mindset, and and so, before I knew it, you know, I had this, this outline just kind of came out of nowhere and and then that turned into my first book and, you know, since written two more.
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So now, you know, published three books and and write a block, and so, you know, I've now got this whole new life as a writer that I don't think I would have had if I hadn't, you know, make the decisions I did, or at least not yet, you know, maybe it's something I would have done in my retirement or or something.
00:21:21.694 --> 00:21:38.019
So that's, you know, one example, really, how it's like, had a massive impact on my life and and I sort of have this saying that inspired me very early on, when I was still sort of trying to figure out what to do, which is, if you want change, you have to create space for it.
00:21:38.019 --> 00:21:40.347
And that's sort of about.
00:21:40.347 --> 00:21:44.455
You know, if you want to change something in your life, you have to get rid of something else.
00:21:44.536 --> 00:22:02.835
You know, because a lot of us are so busy In our day to day that if we keep doing what we've always done, then where is the new gonna come in, you know where's the change gonna fit into your life, and and so I've, you know, believe that, yeah, if you want change, you have to say, you know, get rid of something and create that space.
00:22:02.835 --> 00:22:05.967
And to me, this is like a perfect example Of that.
00:22:05.967 --> 00:22:18.797
Because I created that space, you know, I took time out from work, I simplified my life and that credit space for, you know, the creative and me and the writer and me to you know, rise, rise to the top and make yourself heard.
00:22:18.797 --> 00:22:24.209
And and that led to, you know, now having this, this career is a writer, which is really awesome, and I love.
00:22:24.769 --> 00:22:33.621
it's really cool when we think our life is gonna go one way and it just does a completely 180 takes us in a completely different direction.
00:22:33.621 --> 00:22:41.378
What advice do you have for others that are navigating societal expectations and pressures?
00:22:41.785 --> 00:22:51.474
This is a few things so the first thing, that just has been huge for me, and so this is something I actually did in my mid 20s, so before I ever set off on this journey.
00:22:51.474 --> 00:23:07.519
But in my mid 20s I went through a phase where I got really interested in psychology and personalities and values and did a lot of work to get to know myself better, and at the time it was really just something that I was interested in and, you know, curious about.
00:23:07.519 --> 00:23:26.708
But I look back now and it's just been so and, you know, so massively impactful and important in my life because it's given me this and, I guess, confidence to know to look at a decision and know if it is the right decision for me and if it suits my personality, does it align with my values?
00:23:26.708 --> 00:23:34.978
And so that would be my first tip to anyone who's having thought similar to what I had Six years ago Rania, what am I doing with my life?
00:23:34.978 --> 00:23:35.660
And I'm not sure.
00:23:35.660 --> 00:23:46.394
And so if you don't feel like you have a good, you know, self-awareness and understanding of who you are and what you value, then that's where I would start, just because it's, you know, worked so well for me.
00:23:47.569 --> 00:23:54.756
And from there my second advice and again, this is sort of something I kind of learned by coincidence rather than intentionally.
00:23:54.756 --> 00:23:56.480
But start small.
00:23:56.480 --> 00:24:00.067
You know, when I set off on this, I said it's going to be for a summer.
00:24:00.067 --> 00:24:17.230
You know, I'm just going to travel in my van for a summer and if I hadn't liked it, I could have just gone back to Auckland and find a job again and return to my old life with you know, I might have lost some money, but I wouldn't have, you know, lost a lot and I I'm really glad that I did it that way.
00:24:17.230 --> 00:24:25.040
It really helped me to ease into it, it made it a lot less risky and it made it a lot less confrontational to other people.
00:24:25.040 --> 00:24:28.599
So for them it was kind of an easier transition transition as well.
00:24:28.599 --> 00:24:34.053
So that's a, you know, yeah, something I've like learned and what recommend to others to consider.
00:24:34.053 --> 00:24:35.739
You know, can you make a small change?
00:24:35.739 --> 00:24:48.240
Can you time box it and say you know I'm going to do this for a certain amount of time and if it works you keep going, and if it doesn't, you can go back to to what you've done before or something else.
00:24:48.240 --> 00:24:48.642
Right?
00:24:50.471 --> 00:24:54.980
And then I think the third one is you know, just trust yourself, trust your gut.
00:24:55.121 --> 00:25:12.079
You know I'm so, so glad I did, and it was really hard at times because, you know, I made decisions that go against everything we're told, everything we're raised to believe, especially as women, what we're supposed to do with our life and and how we're supposed to feel about that.
00:25:12.691 --> 00:25:30.980
And I have so, so much respect for moms and I know so many people who you know have chosen that path and are so happy with it and it was clearly the right path for them and that's beautiful, but it isn't for everyone and and if you're that person and you want to, you know, do something differently.
00:25:30.980 --> 00:25:40.977
It is going to be hard, but I think the one thing you know I often say I think in life there is no guaranteed path to happiness, no matter what you do.
00:25:40.977 --> 00:25:45.819
But I do think that a fast track to unhappiness is not being true to yourself.
00:25:45.819 --> 00:25:48.433
So that's how I look at it.
00:25:48.433 --> 00:25:58.657
You know, like following my own path is hard sometimes, but you know, going the other way and doing something that isn't me just because everyone else is doing it, I'm pretty sure would be even harder.
00:25:58.657 --> 00:26:04.613
So, yes, I'd say people, you know, go for it and and push through the hard times, it'll be worth it.
00:26:04.933 --> 00:26:10.922
On the other end, that's all such really great advice, especially when you say you know, start small.
00:26:10.922 --> 00:26:17.538
I think oftentimes people they want to do something, but in looking at the big picture is always great.
00:26:17.538 --> 00:26:20.355
I'm one of those that always has to see the whole big picture.
00:26:20.355 --> 00:26:32.298
However, sometimes it's okay to just look a little bit ahead of us and start small, because if we are looking at that big picture, it can cause you to get overwhelmed, you get scared.
00:26:32.298 --> 00:26:35.436
You'd say, okay, never mind, it's too much, I can't do it.
00:26:35.436 --> 00:26:38.794
So I think that's all really great advice, yeah totally agree.
00:26:39.769 --> 00:26:47.736
And also you know these, these sort of decisions, especially, you know, breaking free from a normal life and traveling.
00:26:47.736 --> 00:26:58.317
I think you know those of us who do it can all admit that it gets romanticized on, you know, social media and other platforms, and the reality is beautiful and amazing and exciting.
00:26:58.317 --> 00:27:01.391
But it is also challenging and hard and it's.
00:27:01.391 --> 00:27:04.616
Some people don't enjoy it, and that's totally okay, right.
00:27:04.616 --> 00:27:15.176
So you might, you might think you want to spend five years or six years like living as a nomad in New Zealand, and then you try it and you realize actually it's not all that it's, you know, it's a thought it would be.
00:27:15.176 --> 00:27:18.896
So by starting small, you kind of give yourself an easy out.
00:27:18.896 --> 00:27:26.080
You know you just yeah, you just stop when you set you word rather than keep going if you do love it.
00:27:26.529 --> 00:27:28.334
So you've talked about this a little bit.
00:27:28.334 --> 00:27:37.300
In your exploration and within your journey, what have you found to be the most fulfilling aspect of the entire journey?
00:27:39.053 --> 00:27:40.217
Ooh, that's a good question.
00:27:40.217 --> 00:27:54.576
The most fulfilling I think it is that that opportunity to be me, to do life my way, Definitely, you know.
00:27:54.576 --> 00:28:19.717
The other thing I would say, something that's been really fulfilling to me, that's like fills my soul and fills my heart, is having so much time to spend outdoor, in a nature and in these beautiful places, Like that's definitely, you know, whenever I'm having a bad day, just you know, go to a beautiful beach or a beautiful scenery and I just I can feel you know the energy and the joy and everything coming back.
00:28:19.717 --> 00:28:22.897
So that's another, you know huge part for me.
00:28:22.897 --> 00:28:25.465
That's really really fulfilling, for sure.
00:28:25.671 --> 00:28:36.317
Yeah, Can you share a memorable encounter or story from your travels that really encapsulates the essence of life done differently?
00:28:39.295 --> 00:29:00.321
Ooh, so many cool encounters and I share, you know, in my latest book, which is called Life Done Differently, and I share the journey of the last six years, and the encounters are a big part of that and how different people I met along the way brought up different ideas and thoughts.
00:29:00.321 --> 00:29:20.823
And one encounter that I think of still very often is I met up with a fellow nomad and we connected over social media, as you do these days, and then we managed to meet up in person and at the time I was thinking a lot about regrets.
00:29:20.823 --> 00:29:36.981
Some questions that other people had asked me had just sort of made me think about you know what, if I do end up regretting this, you know, the choice to kind of walk away from my career and live this way, the choice not to get married and have children, all you know, those sort of things were on my mind.
00:29:36.981 --> 00:29:42.422
And so I met this fellow nomad, a woman a few years older than me.
00:29:42.422 --> 00:30:16.741
So you know I say a few years, so she probably would have been a good 20, 25 years older than me and we met and somehow this topic came up and she shared that you know she'd gone through a difficult time in her life a few years earlier, where her marriage broke down around the same time that her kids left the house and then a beloved family pet died, and so she kind of went, you know, within a few months, from being this mom of the home, you know, and wife, to being on her own and having, you know, lost, like her partner.
00:30:16.741 --> 00:30:22.997
And obviously her kids were still there, but, you know, they were living on their own and didn't need mom as much anymore.
00:30:23.289 --> 00:30:39.638
And so she shared that she went through a period where she dealt, you know, struggled, a lot with regrets and a lot of, you know, thoughts about oh, I should have done this and I should have fought harder for the marriage and I should have, you know, done more things for myself so that I wouldn't feel so lost now.
00:30:39.638 --> 00:30:47.501
And then I asked her you know, how did you get out of that, like, how did you stop being, you know, stuck in that that thinking around regret?
00:30:47.501 --> 00:31:00.452
She realized that regrets are wasted effort because you can't change it anymore anyway and that there's really no point in regretting these things that happen because the past is the past.
00:31:00.452 --> 00:31:07.970
And yeah, and so that to me, was sort of really kind of woke me up and was really inspiring.
00:31:07.970 --> 00:31:16.998
And you know, because she's so right, like regrets and thinking about the past, you can't change it anymore, so you might as well focus on the future.
00:31:16.998 --> 00:31:17.891
So how?
00:31:17.931 --> 00:31:20.579
has your perspective on success evolved?
00:31:21.392 --> 00:31:24.039
Ooh, I like that question, that's great.
00:31:24.039 --> 00:31:45.317
So I actually have an answer on this, because I've thought about this quite a bit and I think in for most people or society on the whole right, when we talk about success, we usually most people think about money, fame, titles, you know, those sort of, I guess, tangible, measurable things.
00:31:45.317 --> 00:31:49.319
And you see someone who has those and that's a successful person.
00:31:49.319 --> 00:31:53.377
To me, my mindset on this has shifted quite a lot.
00:31:53.778 --> 00:31:56.075
For me, success these days is happiness.
00:31:56.075 --> 00:32:12.222
So that to me, is the ultimate, you know, goal in life, and I think that most people would ultimately agree with that right, because I think most people chase after fame and money and titles, because they think it'll bring them happiness.
00:32:12.222 --> 00:32:21.044
So I've kind of decided to kind of shortcut that and just go straight for the happiness piece.
00:32:21.044 --> 00:32:30.676
And so for me now, a successful person is, you know, someone who is really, you know, happy and content in their life.
00:32:30.676 --> 00:32:39.298
And when I talk about happiness, really I mean that content, overall life satisfaction, rather than the joy in the moment, happiness.
00:32:39.298 --> 00:32:42.275
So yeah, so that's, you know, a big shift.
00:32:42.275 --> 00:32:44.359
In success these days is about being happy.
00:32:45.630 --> 00:32:46.232
I love that.
00:32:46.232 --> 00:32:51.099
So what projects or adventures are on the horizon for you?
00:32:52.491 --> 00:33:14.781
Yeah, so I've been thinking about that a lot lately actually, and I am sort of at a point where I do crave a little bit more stability and maybe, you know, having a base somewhere, and I'm sort of resisting the, you know, settling down for real idea because that seems like a little bit too far that way.
00:33:14.781 --> 00:33:25.163
So I'd love to find a middle ground option where, you know, maybe I have a base somewhere but I still have that flexibility to travel a lot.
00:33:25.163 --> 00:33:38.301
And so, you know, one idea that I'm thinking about at the moment is to maybe get a caravan and have a, you know, maybe a more or less fixed based at you know one particular campground and then just travel from there.
00:33:38.301 --> 00:33:44.957
So I have that place that I can come back to, but I still have the flexibility and freedom and time of travel that I love so much.
00:33:44.957 --> 00:33:50.461
So, yeah, so that's kind of, you know, something on the horizon right now.
00:33:50.461 --> 00:33:55.952
Maybe I do tend to change my mind quite a lot about what I want to do next, so don't hold me too much.
00:33:57.410 --> 00:33:58.634
There's nothing wrong with that.
00:33:58.634 --> 00:34:01.898
So where can our listeners find you online?
00:34:01.898 --> 00:34:02.991
Oh, yeah, so.
00:34:03.311 --> 00:34:17.643
I have a blog or a website called it's life done differently dot com, and I'm on Facebook and Instagram as life done differently NZ for New Zealand at the end.
00:34:17.643 --> 00:34:30.690
I've also just published my latest book, which is called life done differently one woman's journey on the road less traveled, which shares the whole story of the last few years of my life following that path.
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